Betty MacDonald, Mr. and Mrs.Hicks and a very special writer

 



Betty MacDonald's sister Alison Bard Burnett



Betty MacDonald's mother Sydney with grandchild Alison Beck

Betty and Don MacDonald in Hollywood


Betty MacDonald fan club fans

don't miss Vita Magica August 2016, please with Wolfgang Hampel and a very special writer.

Wolfgang Hampel's Ma and Pa Kettle biography is much funnier than a Ma and Pa Kettle movie. 

When Betty MacDonald's sister Alison Bard Burnett talkes about her experiences with the Kettles even my mother-in-law is laughing. This is very surprising because she laughs very seldom. 

We don't have neighbours like the Kettles. Our neighbours are like Mr. and Mrs. Hicks.

They have no children. We have a boy and two girls. Mr. and Mrs. Hicks are cutting down everything in the garden. Ours looks like a paradise or a green hell with many trees and branches. Mr. Hicks always says to us: If you need help I'll cut everything down for you but we refuse so far. We have two dogs. Mr. and Mrs. Hicks don't like dogs or cats because Mrs. Hicks is very allergic. By the way we won't ever have any chickens although is seems that our children bring a new pet home every day. I know what they are talking about when they say: Mother, we have a surprise! You won't believe it! ( I do! )

Mrs. Hicks is cleaning the house night and day and is called ' our newspaper' because she knows everything about the people in our community.
You know I thought it was a very witty idea to lend our Mrs. Hicks Betty MacDonald's The Egg and I which she wasn't aware of. After she read Betty MacDonald's book she said smiling: It was very funny but I dislike this awful Mrs. Hicks. She obviously doesn't understand the meaning of life. I couldn't say anything and looked at her with an open mouth. Mrs. Hicks gave me a strange look and said: Darling, is everything ok with you? You look terrible this morning!

I want to share a very special Betty MacDonald family story. My grandmother wrote letters to Betty MacDonald, Mary and Sydney Bard because she loved Betty MacDonald's and Mary Bard's books. She was very fond after she got delightful letters written by Betty MacDonald, Mary Bard and even from mother Sydney Bard. I'll write a Betty MacDonald Fan Club Article about it.

My girls and I like like Betty MacDonald's Nancy and Plum, The Egg and I, Anybody can do anything and Onions in the Stew. My hubby as he has the same profession as Mary Bard's husband Dr. Clyde Jensen prefers Betty MacDonald's The Plague and I and Mary Bard's The doctor wears three faces. Our boy likes the Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle Stories. He always says: I don't behave like the boys and girls in the books and don't need a Piggle-Wiggle cure. I'm not sure. Not at all!

We can't wait to read Gwen Grant's books. We are very fond of Monica Sone's Nisei Daughter. Monica Sone, who is Kimi in Betty MacDonald's The Plague and I, is our favourite person in Betty MacDonald's books.

We would like to visit the state of Washington, Seattle, Laurelhurst and Vashon Island and attend one of Darsie Beck's workshops.

Congratulations! Betty MacDonald Fan Club has the most interesting and fascinating Betty MacDonald Honour members. 


Betty MacDonald cook fan club project is really a fascinating one.

Betty MacDonald fan club letter collection includes several letters of Betty MacDonald.

Betty MacDonald explained in detail the questions regarding Gammy's cooking.

I can imagine very well how Betty, Mary and her siblings felt because I had a grandmother like this.

She was the most wonderful and charming person on earth but her cooking was dreadful.

We children were very much afraid of it like Betty MacDonald and her family.

Betty MacDonald fan club honor member Mr. Tigerli can be very happy and grateful to have a gourmet cook like 'Italian' Betty MacDonald - Betty MacDonald fan club honor member Letizia Mancino.

It would be very nice if Mr. Tigerli and Letizia Mancino could share some of their favourite recipes.

We are very curious.

Thanks a million in advance! 


We are going to publish new Betty MacDonald essays on Betty MacDonald's gardens and nature in Washington State.

Betty MacDonald fan club newsletter August will be very interesting because we'll share new outstanding Betty MacDonald fan club research results.
   
You shouldn't miss our International Betty MacDonald fan club events  because you can make the most wonderful friends there.

If you have any info regarding Betty MacDonald's favourite recipes, let us know, please.

Betty MacDonald and Mary Bard Jensen wanted to publish a cookbook.

Do you know the title?

If so send a mail please and maybe you'll be the winner of several new Betty MacDonald fan club items.

Lisa and Betty MacDonald fan club cooking research team are working on a new item 'Betty MacDonald and her favourite recipes'.
 


Betty MacDonald fans asked their favourite writer many questions regarding her cooking and recipes.

There had been many excellent cooks in the Bard family, for example Betty MacDonald's mother Sydney Bard. 

Betty MacDonald's husband Donald Chauncey MacDonald tried to be a good cook too.

Can you remember his favourite recipe?

If so send us mail and you can win the new Betty MacDonald fan club item 'Betty MacDonald and her favourite recipes'.

               Deadline: August 31, 2016
 
Good luck!

Join our current Betty MacDonald fan club contest, please. 

If you know the persons in our photo send us a mail. 

Deadline: August 31, 2016

You can win very interesting Betty MacDonald fan club items. 

Betty MacDonald fan club newsletter August  includes the updated Betty MacDonald fan club essays ' Betty MacDonald in Hollywood' and  ' Betty MacDonald and Dorita Hess '. 

There is also an article about Betty MacDonald fan club letter collection.


We got very important info regarding the original 'The Egg and I' and the way Betty MacDonald described her first husband Robert Eugene Heskett and their neighbours.

We are still working on Betty MacDonald fan club newsletter August with many new research results regarding this subject and many other very interesting stories. 

Many greetings from International Betty MacDonald fan club Olympics 2016 meeting in Rio.

Betty MacDonald fan club fans from 5 continents have a great time there.

More info are coming soon.

Many Betty MacDonald fan club fans from all over the world are so delighted that their beloved Betty MacDonald fan club honor member Mr. Tigerli is back. 

They enjoy the new very funny and exciting Mr. Tigerli adventure very much.


Thanks a million dearest Letizia Mancino, Mary Holmes and Mr. Tigerli for sharing the new golden Mr. Tigerli treasure! 

We adore you so much!

Betty MacDonald fan club fans who are devoted Mr. Tigerli fans won't have any difficulties to answer the new Betty MacDonald fan club contest question.

If you can answer this question you might be our winner of new Betty MacDonald fan club Mr. Tigerli contest.

Maybe Mr. Tigerli is going to take part at the next ESC and is singing a duet with a very beautiful lady. 

Who is the very beautiful lady?

Deadline: August 31, 2016



That's my favourite quote by Betty MacDonald. 



We got so many mails.

Thank you so much for sending your favourite Betty MacDonald quote.

We look forward to read your No 1 and there are so many wonderful ones by beloved Betty MacDonald. 


Many greetings to our Betty MacDonald fan club fans at Betty MacDonald fan club Olympics 2016 event in Rio.

They are going to share their experiences in Betty MacDonald fan club newsletter August.



We are working on a new Betty MacDonald biography and documentary with many brilliant colour photos.

If you'd like to share your colour photos of Betty MacDonald and her family we can offer you several new Betty MacDonald fan club items as a special Betty MacDonald fan club gift.

Thank you so much in advance for your support.


Thank you so much for sending us the most wonderful quotes by Betty MacDonald. 

There are many more great ones which are not mentioned in the list.

We are delighted.

Send us your favourite Betty MacDonald quote, please.

You can find some of Betty MacDonald's most popular quotes below.

In case you can't find your favourite Betty MacDonald quote in it, send us yours, please.

Deadline:  August 31, 2016

Don't miss it, please. 

You can win several new Betty MacDonald fan club items.  

Betty MacDonald fan club organizer Linde Lund posted on Facebook about a possible Betty MacDonald fan club meeting on Betty MacDonald's magical Vashon Island.

( see info at the end of this posting )

August will be a very exciting month for many Betty MacDonald fan club fans from all over the world.



We are going to present Betty MacDonald fan club book cover winner. 

Betty MacDonald fan club letter research team got some very interesting letters and documents some days ago.



If you'd like to share some of your letters by Betty MacDonald, Mary Bard Jensen and other family members join our Betty MacDonald fan club letter research team, please. 


Betty MacDonald fan club letter research team got some very important letters by Betty MacDonald, Mary Bard Jensen and other family members.

Betty MacDonald, her sister Mary Bard Jensen and the other family members wrote very witty and interesting letters.

We are going to present some of best ones at Betty MacDonald fan club Olympics 2016 event entitled ' The pen and I '. 

We got several new outstanding letters from Betty MacDonald fan club fans whose relatives had been in contact with Betty MacDonald and other family members.  

Thank you so much for your outstanding support.



Betty MacDonald fan club event team is very happy to hear from you and they got some really great ideas for the next International event. 

Thanks a lot!

Betty MacDonald fan club honor member Mr. Tigerli  and our 'Italian Betty MacDonald' - Betty MacDonald fan club honor member author and artist Letizia Mancino belong to the most popular Betty MacDonald fan club teams in our history.

Letizia Mancino's  magical Betty MacDonald Gallery  is a special gift for our Betty MacDonald fan club fans.  

Greta is going to share new info on her latest Betty MacDonald fan club project ' Betty MacDonald on Vashon Island '. 

We are looking for signed or dedicated first editions in great condition with dust jackets by Betty MacDonald and Mary Bard Jensen for our fans.

Betty MacDonald Memorial Award Winner Wolfgang Hampel  and Betty MacDonald fan club research team are working on an updated Betty MacDonald biography and new Betty MacDonald documentary.

Dearest new Betty MacDonald fan club fans you'll receive a very important message by Betty MacDonald fan club event team.

This message includes a very nice Betty MacDonald fan club surprise and many info on our current Betty MacDonald fan club projects.

Join one of our Betty MacDonald fan club research teams, please. 

Thanks a million in advance for your outstanding support.

Enjoy a new breakfast at the bookstore with Brad and Nick, please

Don't miss Wolfgang Hampel's Vita Magica August, please.

Wolfgang invited a very special writer. 

Wolfgang Hampel and his famous guests had lots of fun and joy at Vita Magica July 2016.

Betty MacDonald fan club honor member Thomas Bödigheimer did a great job.

His voice and music are outstanding! 

Thank you so much dearest Thomas! 

Don't miss fascinating Vita Magica program August - December 2016, please. 

Vita Magica was celebrating its 1st anniversary.   

Jamie-Lee with Ghost got over 8 million views and more than 68.000 people like the song.

This is our Betty MacDonald fan club ESC 2016 TOP 5 according to Betty MacDonald fan club ESC fans in 40 countries. 

Betty MacDonald's very beautiful Vashon Island would be an ideal place for an International Betty MacDonald fan club event.

Take care,

Gracia

Betty MacDonald Quotes

       

• 
  There’s nothing as cozy as a piece of candy and a book.
  

  Betty MacDonald

  Book, Cozy, Pieces

  save quote report
• The coffee was so strong it snarled as it lurched out of the pot.
  

  Betty MacDonald

  Strong, Coffee, Pot

  save quote report
• I am neither Christian enough nor charitable enough to like anybody just because he is alive and breathing. I want people to interest or amuse me. I want them fascinating and witty or so dul as to be different. I want them either intellectually stimulating or wonderfully corny; perfectly charming or hundred percent stinker. I like my chosen companions to be distinguishable from the undulating masses and I don't care how.
  

  Betty MacDonald

  Christian, Witty, Breathing

  save quote report
• Her magic formula for dealing with children is ignoring all faults and accenting tiny virtues. She says, "Instead of telling Tommy day in and day out that he is the naughtiest boy in the United States of America, which could very well be true, take an aspirin and comment on his neatly tied shoes. Almost anybody would rather be known for expert shoe-tying than for kicking the cat." She always tells whiners how charming they are--bullies how brave--bad sports how good--sneaks how honest!
  

  Betty MacDonald

  Sports, Children, Cat

  save quote report
• In the country Sunday is the day on which you do exactly as much work as you do on other days but feel guilty all the time you are doing it because Sunday is a day of rest.
  

  Betty MacDonald

  Country, Sunday, Guilty

  save quote report
• I'll do it because I want to but not because you tell me to!
  

  Betty MacDonald

  Want

  save quote report
• In the country, weather is as important as food and sometimes means the difference between life and death.
  

  Betty MacDonald

  Country, Mean, Weather

  save quote report
• Our little room was morbidly quiet and sorrow was heaped in my corner like dirty snow.
  

  Betty MacDonald

  Dirty, Snow, Sorrow

  save quote report
• a grudge will soon rot the pocket you carry it in.
  

  Betty MacDonald

  Bitterness, Pockets, Resentment

  save quote report
• Gammy used to say, 'Too much scrubbing takes the life right out of things.'
  

  Betty MacDonald

  Too Much, Used

  save quote report
• Dare we face the question of just how much of the darkness around us is of our own making?
  

  Betty MacDonald

  Darkness, Faces, Trouble

  save quote report

 

Don't miss this very special book, please.

Vita Magica 

Betty MacDonald fan club

Betty MacDonald forum  

Wolfgang Hampel - Wikipedia ( English ) 

Wolfgang Hampel - Wikipedia ( English ) - The Egg and I 

Wolfgang Hampel - Wikipedia ( German )

Wolfgang Hampel - Memim ( English )

Vashon Island - Wikipedia ( German )

Wolfgang Hampel - Monica Sone - Wikipedia ( English )

Wolfgang Hampel - Ma and Pa Kettle - Wikipedia ( English )

Wolfgang Hampel - Ma and Pa Kettle - Wikipedia ( French ) 

Wolfgang Hampel - Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle - Wikipedia ( English)

Wolfgang Hampel in Florida State University 

Betty MacDonald fan club founder Wolfgang Hampel 

Betty MacDonald fan club interviews on CD/DVD

Betty MacDonald fan club items 

Betty MacDonald fan club items  - comments

Betty MacDonald fan club - The Stove and I  

Betty MacDonald fan club groups 

Betty MacDonald fan club organizer Linde Lund    

 

Rita Knobel Ulrich - Islam in Germany - a very interesting ZDF  ( 2nd German Television ) documentary with English subtitles 

Linde Lund shared Pictures of Heidelberg's photo.

22 hrs ·

Dear Aashish Bernd Rudi Friedrich Pascale Heiderose Nunzia Pieter Michail Waseem Ursula Thomas Tatjana Theresia Franziska Nicole Ernst Wolf, Michael Sabine Winfried Schwab Immo Sascha Karl Angela Ulrich Wellhöfer Perkeo Thomas Barth Kirsten Birthe Andre Horst Dawid Dr. Karl A. Lamers Europäischer Hof Heidelberg and all our other friends don't miss Vita Magica on Tuesday 28 th, 2016 please. The subject is magical Heidelberg with Rudi Lerche and other surprising guests. http://wolfvitamagica.blogspot.de/…/vita-magica-juni-2016-m…

10 You, Marvin Maus, Peter Müller and 7 others

Comments

Dawid Brueckner It´s a beautiful reconstruction. Thank you Linde .

Unlike · Reply · 2 · 21 hrs

Bernd Kunze we will be there, one year vita magica, congratulations Wolfgang Hampel and Rita Kocher.

Linde Lund Dearst Rita Kocher und Wolfgang Hampel Congratulations!!!! Happy Birthday Vita Magica and all the best for the future! All our love and best wishes from Linde, Astrid and Lund family

Like · Reply · 1 · 21 hrs

Thomas Bödigheimer i am there Linde

Unlike · Reply · 1 · 20 hrs

Rita Knobel Ulrich - Islam in Germany - a very interesting ZDF  ( 2nd German Television ) documentary with English subtitles.  

 



 

Mr. Tigerli in China

Copyright 2016 by Letizia Mancino
translation by Mary Holmes
All rights reserved  

Yes Betty, either or it seems he wanted to fly only with Singapore Airways.

Boeing or Airbus, it’s just the same isn’t it? Aren’t they both just fat birds with 500 passengers?

Yes, but Singapore Airlines has the most beautiful airhostesses: delicate, fine, graceful…  Mr. Tigerli had looked forward to the flight so much!

So the little man was disappointed?

You just can’t imagine how disappointed he was.

 But thank God one of the hostesses was a pretty Chinese girl. Mr. Tigerli purred loudly but she didn’t hear him because the purring of the Airbus 380 was even louder.

The poor cat!

You’ve said it Betty. Mr. Tigerli was in a very bad mood and asked me for a loud speaker.

I’m sure you can get one in 1^st Class.

“”Russian Girl” had even heard you over the roar of the Niagara Falls” I said to Mr. Tigerli. “You are a very unfaithful cat. You wanted to get to know Asiatic girls. That’s how it is when one leaves one’s first love”.

And what did he say to that?

“Men are hunters” was his answer.

Yes, my dear cat, a mouse hunter. And what else did he say?

Not another word. He behaved as if he hadn’t heard me.

The Airbus is very loud.

I told him shortly “Don’t trouble yourself about “Chinese Girl”. There will be enough even prettier girls in China. Wait till we land in Guilin”.

Did he understand you?

Naturally Mr. Tigerli understood me immediately. Yes, sweetheart, don’t worry. They will find you something sweet to eat.

And he?

He was so happy.

No problem going through the immigration control?

Naturally!  Lots of problems. How could I explain to customs that the cat had come as a tourist to China to buy shoes?

Fur in exchange for shoes…

Don’t be so cynical Betty!

Cat meat in exchange for shoes?

I said to the officials. He isn’t a cat, he is Casanova.

“Erotica Felina”

He came through the pass control with no trouble!

Is this Mr. Tigerli?

     
          

Linde Lund

August 1 at 12:57 pm

Add This Sharing

·

Betty MacDonald's Vashon Island is a paradise.

info to: Sandra Lorinda Traci Petr Dana Jana Michaela Rebekah Swiss Charrd Tru John Darsie Darsie Toby Jeanine Carol Justin Lila Daniel Mo Nika Steve Neal Jitka Jitka Tami Pete Laurie Maia Nancy Kelly Pam Mary Jan and all our other friends

www.bettymacdonaldfanclub.blogspot.com/

Finding Island Time: Vashon from Seattle

Take an illustrated day trip through Washington state’s largest city with artist Candace Rose Rardon.

gadventures.com

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30You, Pam Ingalls, Aça Alanguva and 27 others

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Linda White yes,if my health allows.I have a few problems but is something I have always wanted to do,especially as I reread her books.

Unlike · Reply · 1 · August 1 at 6:37pm

Linde Lund Dear Linda I'll keep you posted.

Like · Reply · 1 · August 1 at 6:42pm

Bella Dillon · Friends with Darsie Beck

I still read Mrs Piggle Wiggle books to this day. I love her farm on vashon.

Unlike · Reply · 1 · August 1 at 10:32pm

Linda White replied · 1 Reply

Lila Taylor Good morning...Linde Lund

Unlike · Reply · 1 · 18 hrs

Rio 2016 Olympics closing ceremony: Super Mario and samba – as it happened

• The final Olympics medal table and results for the Games
• Check out our new Instagram account

A subtle reminder that the Games took place in Brazil. Photograph: Fabrizio Bensch/Reuters

Tom Lutz

Monday 22 August 2016 02.47 BST Last modified on Monday 22 August 2016 02.49 BST

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• 9h ago Thomas Bach gives the kind of paternalistic, patronising speech the IOC is famous for
• 12h ago The final table (although it's not about winning, it's about taking part. And winning)
• 12h ago Flagbearer news

Show

9h ago 02:47

Big firework, bigger firework, very big firework ... BIGGEST FIREWORK. And we are done. A joyful end to the Games, once Bach and the suits slunk off. And the ceremony is done. Good night, and thank you for reading. It’s been a fun Games on the sporting side of things, but then again it’s the Olympics - when isn’t it?

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9h ago 02:41

The float has slowed down, if we have to wait until it leaves the stadium before we can call an end to proceedings we’re going to be here for a long time. Ah, good they’ve started the fireworks - always a sign the end is nigh.

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9h ago 02:39

Hooray! The carnival floats have arrived. This may go on for a while. It’s a very large float and it’s moving very slowly.

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9h ago 02:30

More fireworks and a big tree has grown in the middle of the arena. That was a nice way to end things actually. I think the flame has gone out now. If Ryan Lochte is going to turn up, he better get a shift on. Lots of carnival stuff on the stage now with some samba thrown in.

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9h ago 02:27

Emma John

I really thought we were reaching the end when the dancing vegetation arrived. But I just checked the programme and there’s another quarter of an hour to go. Unless this really is the shared acid trip it looks like and I’m actually back in a bar in Copacabana staring at a plate of broccoli.

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9h ago 02:24

Bach tells us he’s very sad but he has to close the Games now, like we’re five years-old and it’s past our bedtime. Way to patronize the world, Thomas!

Updated at 2.25am BST

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9h ago 02:19

Thomas Bach gives the kind of paternalistic, patronising speech the IOC is famous for

Bach calls the Olympics “a marvelous Games in a marvelous city.” He says the Games will make Rio better after the Games. As a former resident of London before and after the 2012 Games I would say this statement needs to be taken with a VERY LARGE pinch of salt. The people of Rio seem to be on the same page and the round of applause is pretty much non-existent as he rattles out his empty claptrap. There is, however, a big cheer for the volunteers, as there should be.

Updated at 2.26am BST

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9h ago 02:14

Here comes IOC president Thomas Bach to offer some platitudes about sport bringing people together/future is bright/we’ve learned lessons about harmony/children are the future/no boundaries/we are all one people/I’m off to my posh hotel in the special IOC express lane, good luck getting the bus home/ebony and ivory live together in perfect harmony on my piano keyboard/power of sport.

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9h ago 02:08

Guzman: “the Brazilian fans have won the gold medal”. That will put them top of the medal table by my calculations. Fix.

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9h ago 02:07

Guzman says he is “proud of his city and his people ... our diversity makes us special ... we will win together”.

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9h ago 02:04

Carlos Arthur Guzman, the head of the Rio Olympic organising committee, is speaking now. Nearly there folks! He describes the Games as a “victory of sport”. Our own Owen Gibson is at the stadium: “Unfortunate scenes as the green pipe through which Super Mario jumped (who turned out to be the Japanese prime minister in disguise) gets stuck in the centre of the field of play as the speeches begin. Several minutes later a gang of stagehands have finally managed to wheel it off.”

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9h ago 02:01

Please let Ryan Lochte put out the Olympic flame by urinating on it.

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10h ago 02:00

Is Super Mario Japanese, Italian or Italian-American then? Bob Hoskins played him in the film and he was English. This is very confusing. The Tokyo 2020 logo is not revealed, with Mount Fuji in the background. That was really good, I have to say.

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10h ago 01:57

The Tokyo instillation has lots of interesting lights. The kind of thing that might be popular at 4am at Burning Man/Glastonbury. The dancing clay people from earlier seem far away now. Still no sign of Ryan Lochte.

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10h ago 01:55

Famous Italian-American plumber Mario (of Super Brothers fame) has turned up and is going to deliver something to Rio. But now he’s turned into Shinzo Abe, the Japanese prime minister. There’s lots of 3D holograms dropping into the stadium now. It’s pretty impressive stuff and is messing with my head slightly. I think Japan may bring an end to the Budget Games era.

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10h ago 01:52

It’s the Japanese bit now as Tokyo says hello in time for the next Games (only three years and 11 months away folks!) Now lots of scenes of Tokyo, reminding us that we have to sit a another two of these ceremonies in four years. But, yes, the video is great and makes me want to go to Japan. Maybe for the Olympics, who knows?

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10h ago 01:51

Thomas Bach lets the governor of Tokyo wave the flag now. This is a new Olympic flag not the one that was marched off by soldiers. If your city pays $8bn it too gets to wave the flag! And now the Japanese national anthem is sung - the second best national anthem behind the French.

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10h ago 01:49

Emma John

It’s all got to the sententious, pseudo-patriotic part of the ceremony - all that business with the flag, and soldiers marching to a background of stirring choral music, and feeling transported to a weird fascist state where everyone has to love sport or they’re taken outside and shot.
Bet Stella McCartney’s really regretting those flashing shoes right now.

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10h ago 01:48

Something’s happening. I think this is the bit they hand the flag over to the next country to host the Games. Hooray! We’re near the end! There are kids singing. The Olympic flag is being marched off by soldiers - maybe to Japan. Or maybe to prison. Who knows? Maybe a story worth looking into.

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10h ago 01:44

Meanwhile, in Fiji:

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10h ago 01:42

Owen Gibson

As the new members of the IOC athlete’s commission are introduced, including Yelena Isinbayeva, the recently retired Russian pole vaulter who railed against the decision of the IAAF to ban them from the track and field competition over institutionalised doping. She’s now getting in on a selfie with the volunteers. Minutes earlier IAAF president Seb Coe, who oversaw the decision, was dishing out the marathon medals. Thomas Bach, the IOC president who has come under fire for being soft on the Russians, watches on.

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10h ago 01:41

The volunteers are now thanked - and quite right too. These guys work long hours for no financial reward. It sounds corny but the Games really wouldn’t work without them. They even do a little musical skit for us (again, unpaid).

Updated at 1.42am BST

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10h ago 01:38

The marathon runners walk off the podium very slowly. Like people who have just run a marathon.

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10h ago 01:36

Still no sign of Ryan Lochte.

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10h ago 01:32

Emma John

IAAF president Lord Coe standing very still and taking this drenching like a man. That’s why they pay him the big bucks. Oh wait it’s actually stopped raining now. That’s why Seb’s hair has kept its shape so well. Thought it was all the Olympic Spirit pumping through his follicles.

Updated at 1.33am BST

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10h ago 01:30

We are now shown various highlights from the Games on the big screens int eh stadium. Neymar gets the biggest cheer, closely followed by Usain Bolt. And we also have the medal ceremony for the marathon, which takes place on the final morning and has a bit of a history at the Olympics apparently.

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10h ago 01:26

Some dancers dressed as clay figures - or are they clay figures dressed as dancers? - are now entertaining us with some clay dancing. Clay isn’t good in the rain, right? They take people off at the French Open when it rains. You can hurt your knees and stuff. Let’s hope those little clay guys are OK out there. Stay safe clay people!
Here’s Emma John: “In keeping with the overall theme of attendance at these Olympics, even the ATHLETES’ seating in the centre of the arena is at least a quarter empty! They’ve clearly put out way too many chairs, like an optimistic amateur pianist at a recital they organised themselves.”

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10h ago 01:20

Emma John

We’ve now reached the “lacemaking” stage of the evening. I’ll be honest, this is the bit I was most ready to laugh at when I read it in the programme. But it’s actually the most powerful segment so far: really moving and empassioned singing from a group of traditional singers from Salvador and accompanied by a rather lovely and hypnotic light show. It’s got the biggest response of the evening so far in the stadium.

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10h ago 01:19

We’ve gone back from the invention of techno in the 1980s to the history of lace in 19th century Brazil now. Lace is really good for projecting on to arena floors because of all the geometric shapes. It is also a reference that people like to stare at geometric shapes at the end of a night out at a techno club.

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10h ago 01:17

Ryan Lochte is still not here.

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10h ago 01:13

In our tour through history, techno has just been invented so we’ve zoomed up from pre-history to 1988. This is good news. And now dancers spell out “Rio 2016”, they’ve skipped the mesozoic era completely. Shoddy. On a more serious note, Dennis Warren emails in: “This prehistoric bit is to celebrate the Capivara national park, which has the largest collection of prehistoric art in Latin America. It’s just had its fundng stopped by the interim government.”

Updated at 1.16am BST

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10h ago 01:12

Not good news for people who wanted an early night. We are now exploring Brazil’s history, starting in PREHISTORIC times. Which lasted ages - like 14 years or something. Dan Lucas on the strong Canadian presence: “This is like the third act of the South Park movie, only with worse music.”

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10h ago 01:10

Fireworks! That means the athletes are all here. Or if they’re not, they can wait out in the car park. There is a little song now to introduce the exciting news that YouTube now has an Olympic channel or some such nonsense. Admit it: no one is interested in the Olympics until they start, then everyone is. And then no one is again.

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10h ago 01:07